NEW LAYOUT :D

Not only is my website actually something for once in a long time (http://www.stellmond.com) so it but I made a new layout for it AND I made my LJ match. So go check it out and assure me that it's cute :)

Before someone asks, the fonts in the headers are 42 and Peach Sundress.

Edit: I just looked and everything is shoved over in IE. Let's take a moment to reflect on how much I care about how my LJ looks in IE. *crickets chirp*

Let it go, let it go, let it go

See, I'm writing this novel, and lately I haven't been writing as much as I'm supposed to because I've been lazy, but tonight I'm not writing because I'm scared. Because I'm seeing myself buried within these people on the page and I thought I was ready for that but maybe I'm not.

Because the thing about love is love does not give a damn. Time means nothing to love. Words like "should" mean nothing to love. The thing about love is that to the same extent that it can make everything feel great it can also make everything hurt. The thing about love is it does whatever it wants. Just like love can elevate everything in such a way that nothing else seems to matter, that everything else feels so insignificant, sometimes it can devastate everything in such a way that nothing else seems to matter, that everything else feels so insignificant. And I know that if I keep distracting myself from its existence, pushing it aside, that for a while I really can convince myself, in not thinking at all, that the feeling is gone, but it's never gone, and however much I can tell myself that there is an end I cannot see it and so it's hard to hold on. So sometimes I can't suffer silently and tonight I just can't, and so I dig my own grave and watch myself do it and I cannot lie about it and I cannot play games.

The thing about my novel is I'm scared but I know that eventually I will have to finish what I've started.